There are countless studies that have revealed that any type of abuse can be traumatic for anyone. When it happens in your own home and there is no one to tell, a way of escape may seem impossible.
Author, minister and motivational speaker Marcia Fisher found the courage at age 52 to finally tell her story, long after she overcome years of abuse. In 2005, after a third suicide attempt, she began to talk about the abuse she experienced as a young girl and soon after, began to write her story.
“I’ve survived a great deal,” she shared. “God must have a purpose and a plan for me to help others.”
To date, Fisher has written two books, “The Odyssey of Survival,” a tell-all memoir in which she reveals her story of abuse and how she survived.
Her second book, “The Long Wondering,” she talks about the many hardships she has faced throughout her life and finding the strength to overcome those hardships to help and empower others.
Fisher explained that it was tremendously hard to write her books and that how, at times, it is hard to read them because she wants to avoid reliving the pain. She wrote her books as a way to release all of those years of abuse and to deal with all of the things that had happened to her.
“I felt ashamed, responsible, and guilty,” she said, recalling the horrifying details of her many years of abuse.
Early in life, Fisher was verbally and physically abused by her mother, the one person she thought should have been able to trust and confide in. Her mother often times beat her until near death and even spat in her face.
Fisher didn’t have a positive outlook on life before the sexual abuse began because her mother was so violently abusive. At the age of 12, the sexual abuse began by her godfather—a powerful man and minister in the government of her native country of Jamaica with whom her mother had a strange relationship.
The abuse went on for 10 years. Fisher was traumatized, even raped repeatedly during that time. She told her mother about her godfather abusing her and was told never to speak about what was happening to her.
“He took advantage of innocent children and their vulnerability,” Fisher said.
As a survivor of abuse, Fisher said that it is important to thrive and be the best we can be, which God has called us to do, not just survive.
So now, Fisher is sharing her story more than ever. “We cannot help what happens to us, especially as children,” Fisher said. “As adults who have survived abuse, we should share our experiences to help others.”
In 2012, she started motivational speaking and even started a ministry called, Revamp My Life to empower women and to help them to move forward, act on their ambitions and desires, and take charge of their lives.
Fisher has given talks all over metropolitan Atlanta in churches and in the community, sharing her story. Her goal is to have her books translated into different languages and eventually be made into a movie.
She shares of times when her mother would tell her to take a bath and get dressed and how her godfather’s chauffeur would come and pick her up, for two and three days at a time, to his home where she was being sexually abused the whole entire time.
She would be taken away on the weekends or sometimes during the middle of the week, whenever her godfather wanted to see her. Fisher said that her mother sacrificed her life and that she was not able to find any refuge or anyone to go to about her situation.
Fisher said she grew up with her birth father in the home, but he was not aware of the abuse that was happening to her and died not ever knowing about the abuse.
At times, when she was being raped, Fisher said she would sing to herself, “Jesus Loves All the Little Children.”
She left Jamaica in 1982 at age 24 and moved to Canada to find a better life for herself.
Fisher, who is a mother of two, was separated from her daughters when she left for Canada due to immigration laws but was reunited with them six years later. She gave birth to her first daughter at age 18 and her second daughter at age 21.
At age 19, she was impregnated by her godfather but was sedated by him and forced to have an abortion.
But even at 19, Fisher said there was no one to tell about the abuse, which is why she didn’t tell anyone about it. She struggled with low self-esteem because she felt if her own mother didn’t love her, who could?
As a result, Fisher endured verbal abuse from her first husband.
Even now, she still does not totally trust men and is not 100 percent vulnerable. She still holds back a little piece of her heart and struggles with her survival instincts, where she doesn’t totally give of herself just in case someone tries to hurt her again.
“I think of myself as an abused little girl trapped in a 12-year-old’s little body,” Fisher continued. There are times when I still feel trapped, but have learned to put one foot in front of the other.”
Fisher’s mother died in 2008. She said she found the courage to forgive her mother and made peace with her before she passed.
Fisher admitted that at first she blamed God for the abuse as a child, but the older she got, she learned survival skills. She started to truly love herself when she realized that God truly loved her and that His love was supreme.
“I didn’t hate myself,” Fisher said. “I hated what was happening to me, the life that I had.
Giving her life to Christ and growing her faith in the Lord has sustained her through the healing process. Fisher remarried in 2009 to a loving and supportive man also from Jamaica.
In addition to having become ordained as a minister, Fisher has made plans to host workshops at her church to help others, as well as starting a book club.
“If I can survive, you can survive,” Fisher offered. “I share my story to encourage others to stand up for themselves and to walk away from things that don’t do them any good.
“If God loves me, I can continue in this world,” Fisher said. “I’m encouraged when I do read my books. I say, ‘Wow!’ ”