Are Black Women Giving up on Black Men?

By Jineea Butler NNPA Columnist | 1/31/2014, 10:45 a.m.
I believe Hollywood is offering an alternative to go along with the national attack on black men. In most of ...

In the latest urban movies, “Best Man Holiday” and “A Madea’s Christmas,” I thought it was interesting that each featured a black woman in a relationship with a White man.  In today’s climate we are used to successful black men dating white women but the introduction of the successful black woman and white men is a new twist in movies.  Since the appointment of President Obama and his lovely wife Michelle, I’ve recognized the relatively new influx of looks I get from Caucasian professionals giving me that ‘I think Michelle is hot and you are to,’ look.

In a “Best Man Holiday,” Nia Long’s character Sydney brings her new flame to the gathering with longtime friends.  Not only were they accepting, they welcomed B-MAC as Taye Diggs jokingly referred to him.  In “A Madea’s Christmas, “ the “Have and Have Nots” star Tika Sumpter is secretly married to a NYU agriculture graduate who also happens to be white.

While there is absolutely nothing wrong with interracial dating, I find it odd that two major productions released during the holidays chose to represent these images.  The implications are far more than just characters in film. When you take attractive women such as Nia Long and TIka Sumpter and pair them with good looking white men, you’re not just selling movies, you’re being suggestive. Even in “Act Like a Woman, Think Like A Man,” Gabrielle Union’s character dates Turtle from the popular HBO series turned movie “Entourage.”

I believe Hollywood is offering an alternative to go along with the national attack on black men.  In most of our minds, the image of the black man is tarnishing, but the black woman has always stayed by the black man – up until now.  Look at the pit bull in a skirt, Rapper Eve who recently accepted a marriage proposal from British Fashion Designer Maximillion Cooper.  Eve is a perfect indication that even the toughest home girl is changing her tune.  Why would the former girlfriend of “Love and Hip Hop” star Stevie J leave America for the American Dream?

One has to wonder has the black woman begun to throw in the towel along with the rest of America.  Why shouldn’t we? Black men are not breaking their necks to make sure we stay within the comforts of their midst.  In fact, it’s the opposite: 72 percent of black children are being raised in single family homes, according to the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development.  That’s a statistic that says we are not planning for families; it also suggests that we don’t think it’s an important goal, and we are not making very wise decisions.

We can always argue all of the obstacles in the way of black men hinder them from being completely focused and successful husbands, fathers and sons, but what are they doing about it?  Are we as black women supposed to stick around and wait until these men turn 70 and realize they should have treated the women in their life better?  Or should we begin to think about catching up with the rest of the society we live in and demand sustainable relationships and marriages.